Good Will Towards Others

Early this morning, I saw an post on JREG from my friend JR.
She is 67 years, has a broken arm, but talked about her recent excursion with her Red Hat Ladies’ group:

"Our Red Hat club made a mother and two children very happy yesterday. We had so many presents for them, we had to transport in a Van. The mother cried, the children were awed at so many presents. What I enjoyed the most was seeing the children's expressions when they realized the packages were for them. It was a happy time for all, and next year we will do the same for another family and also go to a nursing home with a few packages. They are the kind of family JRE talked about all thru his campaign. A single parent(Mother) raising two children alone and on a waitress salary with no big bucks left for tips. This family had nothing for Christmas, not even a tree. These children would have had nothing under the tree and the Mom would have felt even worse. It is hard to accept charity and I do not wish to call it that, it was a group of old ladies helping a less fortunate family enjoy Christmas.

A single parent(Mother) raising two children alone and on a waitress salary with no big bucks left for tips. This family had nothing for Christmas, not even a tree. These children would have had nothing under the tree and the Mom would have felt even worse. It is hard to accept charity and I do not wish to call it that, it was a group of old ladies helping a less fortunate family enjoy Christmas. The gifts were mostly clothing for the children as they were being made fun of at school. They got a couple of gifts that were not clothing, something they will have for sometime to come if they take care of it. I know the more a person gives of themselves, it comes back ten fold. I felt really good inside when I saw the eyes and the smiles on the children's faces. My wish is that we could have helped even more, but the charity we went thru only gave us this family. We were thanked over and over by the Mom and the children. This Mom is trying very hard to better herself so she and her children can have a better life. This is all the thanks anyone needs. It wasn't buying and giving the gifts that touched our group, it was the fact that we were able to help this family and that is what we all felt good about. "

Then when checking my work e-mail, someone had posted a message on all staff listserv about my organization's holiday party last Friday afternoon. The message read somewhat like the following:

"WHERE'S THE MEAT???????Whoever decides to plan the christmas party next year, canthey PLEASE let the staff/faculty know what the menu will be.Because if I had known that I was going to be served fruits,vegetables, and cheese, I would have never skipped lunch, norwould I had attended the xmas party. I am very upset becauseI attended a xmas party and there was no meat on the table."

All day, I saw messages about the lack of meat at the party, and how some civil service staff said they were "worth more than fruit and cheese". It was challenging for me not to respond to them personally. Last couple of weeks the Library was in the newspapers about their goodwill towards others, and yet these people were disappointed they didn't have the fancy little meat balls and other things to provide them a lunch, as they were accustomed in the past. These same people I guess have felt downtrodden for years, but compared to kids who needed clothes, or those who lost their homes and had nothing to give the children from Santa, I felt their messages spoke of entitlements. Perhaps they didn't mean to sound that way. But I wondered why I was personally hurt by their messages, and some childhood memories reappeared.

In 1969, a couple days before Christmas Eve, in a year my parents were doing better, my mother had finished the holiday shopping early. We had presents under our beautiful tree. Mama was tired, but proud that she knew that we knew she and Santa had gotten to us in timely manner. That night, someone left the sliding door unlocked. A young man sneaked into our house, and stole nearly all of the presents. We discovered the robber going out the back gate the next morning. Not only were the kids' hopes flattened, my mother was so sad. She and my father had worked so hard that year.

But like JRE and Elizabeth, Mama was not undaunted. She was not able to replace all our gifts she bought us, but she had just a little saved for emergencies. Mama went out and bought gifts for us so that we kids had something under the tree, and a better story to tell. It worked.

This time helps me remember that at times, I too was ungrateful for what I received for holiday gifts. But I've gotten older, and now that I help mama give money to the grandchildren, I can understand her pride. She cannot afford to send her grandchildren money, and I'd rather help her bring a smile to them than not.

She's definitely the spirit of the Three Wisemen who are reported to have stood around Jesus' manger: Good Will Towards Others. They brought good things for a future king. But perhaps Joseph needed help to get his carpentry business going. We don't know, but interesting to explore why they felt the automatic need to bring gold. The others were to cleanse the place, and to smell better, since the manger was in of barn of animals.

So I'm following a few steps at a time in Mama's path. Thank you, Mama, for helping me to realize that while it is good to think of yourself when others may not, you have to lift others when you are able to do so. I'm lifting you up.

To my colleagues who were disappointed in the goodies provided in the Holiday Party, go help your mothers. If you don't have mothers, hug your children, and help out in a place of the homeless. Your perspective may change, just as Christ's apostles have told us time and time again, when they watched him feed many thousands with 5 fish and a couple of loaves of bread.